The young man came up to me after service, shaking with barely contained anger. “I just don’t believe any of this stuff!” He lashed out.
I calmly responded, “Okay. Do you mind telling me what you do believe?”
He stopped, caught off guard. I imagine he expected that I would meet anger with anger, that I would condemn him and kick him out. But my question broke through his assumptions. His demeanor began to change as he began talking about his beliefs. I asked questions to prompt him to dig deeper. After a while, he began to ask me why I believed the things I did, and why they made sense to me.
What could have been a fruitless shouting match became a calm discussion about matters of faith. Sometimes, when our deepest convictions get challenged, we tend to respond passionately. We care about our beliefs! They are part of who we are! And rightly so. Often though, showing consideration and compassion and genuine interest in where someone else is coming from will go much farther towards a productive discussion than an impassioned tirade on why the other person is wrong.
1 Peter 3:15 says, “Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.” If you are reading this as a Christian, I hope you will study what you believe so that you have reasons for the hope that you have. When you engage in discussions, though, remember to “do this with gentleness and respect.” The image is less of a violent boxing match and more walking together on a journey.
In another place, the scripture says, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires, “ (James 1:19-20). In our culture, however, everyone seems to be quick to speak and quick to become angry. Let us learn to be quick to listen instead.
Dr. John Reside
Minister at First Christian Church
The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of The Kewanee Voice.
